Food for Drunks
What do you like to eat when you’re drunk? We’re talking about food you like to eat when you’re actually drunk, not the next day when you’re hungover. That’s an entirely different subject altogether. We at Caveday conducted an extensive online survey asking this question. We asked people on Facebook, so you know this survey is legit. Here’s what we found…
The formula is simple. Salt + Fat + Heat = Food. Violate any of the variables of this equation and it simply isn’t edible. When asked specifically what kind of food people eat while intoxicated, mostly everyone opted for Mexican and the rest chose Taco Bell.
Some people preferred pizza but mentioned that it’s usually not worth the hassle. What they really mean is that it’s too hard to call the pizza place and articulate the order. On that note, the people at the Mexican joint don’t know what you’re saying either, but somehow it works out. Why is it that drunk people they think they’re fluent in Spanish and that its helpful to order that way? Good thing our amigos at the taco shop are bilingual and speak Spanish and Drunk. In summary, Mexican food and T-Bell both satisfy the drunken food equation quite effectively. But let’s see what happens when we break the rules.
I have this friend who always wants to eat Subway on the way home from going out. Not a meatball sandwich, which possibly might be good, but actually a standard cold turkey sandwich with vegetables in it. Think about that for a moment. It’s actually making me gag just imagining it. Or how about this scenario? You’re at a friend’s birthday party having some cocktails, getting a little tipsy, and whoop-dee-fucking-doo out comes the birthday cake. You have to eat a slice of cake, it’s a rule. As if you would dishonor your friend if you refused. Cake, ice cream, and sweets taste like shit if you’ve been drinking. If they don’t, then you haven’t been drinking enough. Stop babysitting.
We at Caveday would like to ask our readers the same question: What do you like to eat when you’re drunk? We’re from Cali and we love our Mexican food but we’re sure that not everyone’s the same. Maybe people from Boston eat clam chowder? Maybe the Japanese eat fried octopus balls? Maybe the Russians eat… whatever Russians eat? Here, the ultimate local drunken palate-pleasers are the coveted carne asade fries. What’s yours?