Weird Hangover Cures

In search of the best hangover cure and the answer to all our prayers, Caveday has stumbled open some weird hangover cures along the way.  From herbal remedies to black magic, we’ve seen it all.  And frankly, we’re desperate enough to try them.

Umeboshi Pickled Plums

From the country that created tentacle cartoon porn and vending machines that sell panties, leave it to the Japanese to come up with a strange hangover cure.  Meet the umeboshi picked plum.  Hungover Japanese people will suck on these sour plums until they dissolve.  The idea is that the acid in the umeboshi will break down the alcohol faster.  Considering that most Japanese business negotiations happen over sake and whiskey, and Japanese are strong in business, this probably works.  I’m going to try it out.  Tomorrow morning.

Keepin it Asian, travel back back in time with me to the reign of Genghis Khan.  This mother fucker used to eat sheep eyes with a cocktail of brine and tomato juice.  Talk about dedication.  I wanna roll with that guy!  No wonder his crew was so diesel.

In Puerto Rico, people put lemons in small wedges under their armpits.  The citrus enters the system and acts as an inhibitor for dehydration.  Hmmm.  Maybe you won’t have to go to the bathroom as much.  And then you won’t have to feel bad about not tipping the bathroom guy that hands you the towels.  I like it.

Romanians love their tripe and claim that its a guaranteed hangover cure.  Tripe is a cow’s stomach.  They boil it up and serve it in a soup.  Tripe is a common ingredient in the Vietnamese soup Pho, which is possibly the best hangover cure of all time.  So maybe the Romanians know whats up.

Back in ancient Greece, after a night of honoring Apollo with gifts of wine, goats, and sodomy, the hungover ones would eat a breakfast of sheep lungs and owl eggs to cure their hangover woes.  Sorry, not for me.

In Haiti, they use Voodoo to fight the sorcery of a hangover.  Finally, a culture that realizes the metaphysical nature of the hangover.  I’ve been saying this for YEARS.  An old myth states that if you put 13 pins into the cork of the bottle of alcohol you drank, the hangover spirits will be kept at bay.

Last but not least, the weirdest and sickest hangover cure comes from right here in the States.  In the wild west days of Wyatt Earp et al, they would drink a cup of tea made from rabbit turds.  I don’t know if there is any scientific benefit behind this, but I shit you not, this is true.

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One Response to “Weird Hangover Cures”

  • Dan Clarke Says:

    They seem really weird. Putting lemons in small wedges under armpits might not help treat a hangover but will surely act as a lemon deodorant.

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